New research reveals that two thirds of young people don’t feel confident talking about sex.
Instead it often seems easier to type your wildest bedroom worries into a search engine to find the answer.
To save you the trouble, we asked Durex’s sex and relationships expert Alix Fox to answer the 10 most Googled sex questions.
From mind-blowing orgasm techniques to bizarre sores down below, here is everything you ever wanted to know about sex (but were too afraid to ask).
1. Where is the G-spot?
“Short for ‘Gräfenberg spot’ and named after a German gynaecologist who first wrote about it in the 1950s, the G-spot is usually located about 1-2 inches inside the vagina, on the front of the vaginal wall – so pressing towards your belly button.
“Although it can differ from woman to woman, many ladies report a patch of flesh there about the size of a penny, which may feel puffier, slightly ridged or rougher than the surrounding tissue; the area tends to plump up during arousal.
“Scientists argue about whether the G-spot exists as a true anatomical structure: plenty now think that what is being described may actually be an internal part of the clitoris, while others reckon it’s simply a place that feels particularly sexually sensitive to lots women.
“What we do know for sure is that stimulating this zone can feel great, and may lead to deep, delicious orgasms. To stimulate the G-spot, try stroking it firmly and rhythmically by curling two fingers into a beckoning ‘come hither’ motion.
2. How to make a woman orgasm?
“Every woman is different: there’s no one-size-fits-all magic move that will make her orgasm, which is why it’s so important to communicate. Ask your partner to tell or show you what touches and techniques work for her personally.
“It’s common for women to take longer to reach climax than men.
“Many need 20 minutes or more of consistent clitoral stimulation in order to enter the O-zone, and a positive experience relies as much upon what’s going on in her head as her body, so make sure she doesn’t feel rushed, judged or pressured, and try focusing your attention on her clitoris.
3. Can you get rid of herpes?
“Herpes is a sexually-transmitted infection caused by the herpes simplex virus, of which there are two main types: HSV-1 and HSV-2. It’s extremely common: by age 25, about six out of 10 people in the UK carry type 1 and about one in 10 carries type 2.
“However, most of these people do not show symptoms, or experience them so mildly that they simply don’t notice. If you do get symptoms, they may include blisters on the genitals lasting two to three weeks, which can be very sore, and flu-like aches and pains.
“These symptoms can be treated, but the herpes virus itself cannot be cured. It remains in the body for life, so you may have more flare ups again in future. Don’t panic though; there’s lots that can be done to manage problems. People who get frequent recurrences may be given antiviral tablets to try and prevent outbreaks. You can get more info at Herpes.org.uk.
“To avoid passing on herpes, never have sex during an outbreak, and always use condoms. Varieties like Durex Invisible are fine enough to provide protection whilst still giving an intimate skin-on-skin feeling – they’re the thinnest latex condom the brand has ever made and finer than a human hair.”
4. How to get rid of genital warts?
“Treating genital warts depends on the type of warts you have (some are soft, others rough and hard, plus they can be raised or flat) and where they’re located (the vagina, groin or anus).
“Topical treatments involve applying a cream, lotion or chemical to the warts, whilst ‘physical ablation’ techniques destroy the warts by freezing, lasers or minor surgery. Sometimes a combination of treatments will be prescribed. They can take a while to work, so it’s crucial to persevere.
“The good news though? Up to a third of people find genital warts disappear on their own within three months. It’s important to see a medical professional and get a qualified opinion on what action to take and how to avoid passing warts on.”
5. What is the clap?
“The clap is a slang term for the STI gonorrhea. There are several theories about where the nickname originated.
“Some people think the term stems from ‘clapier’, an old French word for ‘brothel’ where you might well catch such an infection.
“Others reckon it refers to an ancient ‘treatment’: clapping an infected penis against a table with a heavy book, to force any discharge out.
“It wouldn’t cure the problem, but it probably would stop you having sex with anyone for a while.”
6. How to get a bigger penis manually?
“There are all manner of pumps, stretchers and extending devices advertised online that are supposed to make a man’s penis bigger.
“Whilst pumps can be helpful if used carefully under medical instruction to aid men with erectile dysfunction to get hard, I don’t recommend any device or exercise designed to increase size.
“Most methods don’t give significant or long-lasting results; lots require you to spend hours if not days wearing an uncomfortable gadget; and some run serious risk of causing injury by damaging delicate penile tissues.
“You can trim your pubic hair to make your penis seem less ‘buried’; losing weight if suitable can help it look more prominent; and wearing a cock ring can help maximise the size of your erection.
“However, the best course of action is to make peace with the natural dimensions of your body; confidence is one of the most attractive traits a person can have in bed and being a good lover is not dependent upon the length of your todger.”
7. How to insert a male organ into a female organ?
“This question is about the basics of penetrative sex. When people talk about ‘having sex’ they often mean vaginal intercourse – when a man inserts his penis into a woman’s vagina.
“This is sometimes called ‘PIV sex’ which stands for ‘penis-in-vagina’. This is only one way to have sex – there are many and different folks like different things.
“Vaginal sex usually begins with a couple getting sexually excited together, by doing things like kissing, caressing and touching each other. This is sometimes called ‘foreplay’ (although it’s important to play, care and give each other pleasure throughout sex, not just before).
“As they get aroused, changes happen to their bodies: the woman’s vagina becomes moister, to make it easier for a penis to slide inside; and the man gets an erection – his penis fills with blood and gets bigger and harder.
“When they’re both ready, the man slides his erect penis inside the woman’s vagina, and moves it back and forth. This can feel really good for both people.
“If either person isn’t turned on enough, or is nervous, getting the ‘male organ’ into the ‘female organ’ can be tricky: the female’s muscles may not be relaxed enough for easy entry, or she may not have produced enough moisture to be comfortable; or the male may not be able to achieve or maintain a stiff enough erection.
“It’s crucial that neither of you feel like you’re rushing things. Like many things in life, sex can seem dauntingly complicated at first and doesn’t always go smoothly the first few times.
“Try not to put pressure on yourselves – just aim to both have fun. If you’ve got fundamental questions about the – ahem – ins and outs of sex and relationships and want reliable, easy to understand answers, check out Brook.org.uk, Bishuk.com and FPA.org.uk.
“These sites have some great resources for parents or carers who want to talk to young people constructively about sex, too.”
8. How long does sex last?
“Research carried out earlier this year suggested that the average British sex session lasts 19 minutes: 10 minutes of foreplay and nine minutes of intercourse.
“If you’re a guy who doesn’t feel his erection is lasting as impressively as you and your partner would like, but you’re not ready for medications like Viagra yet, try a cock ring like the Durex Pleasure Ring.
“It’s a soft, stretchy loop that you slide over your penis once it’s hard and position at the base, where it gently prevents blood from flowing out too fast, helping you maintain a stronger erection for longer.”